A Career as an Artist Ain't an Easy Row to Hoe

Keynote address for
The Art of Employment:
Careers in the Arts for People with Disabilities
March 25 & 26, 2002
McNamara Alumni Center, University of Minnesota
Minneapolis, MN

"Art and performance - be it literary, dance, theatre, music, film, video, or humour - are magic and creative forces.  Mix them with the experience of disability and they become a miraculous expression of the illusion of limitation and proof of the existence of infinite human potential."

The Art of Employment - in the Arts.  Some might say the TRICK of employment in the Arts.  It can be a tricky thing - and a very rewarding effort.  I've been invited to briefly address the topic of a Career as an Artist - which truly is not always an easy row to hoe.  But it can be a path to opportunities for personal growth and satisfaction, and it can add meaning to our lives.

This afternoon I'll share a little of my background with you, and express my personal opinions and feelings about careers in the arts for people with disabilities.  I have no formula that ensures artistic enlightenment, fame, fortune, or guarantees of employment.  Nor do I have All The Answers To Everything You Always Wanted to Know About How to Become A Professional Artist But Were Afraid To Ask.    But I can and will share some of my thoughts with you.

I've only recently realized that I do actually have a career as an artist - usually I just think of myself as a "working stiff."      For most of my employment history, I've worked in some sort of non-profit arts organization, although I was employed by a "for-profit" company once - I did an 18 month stint as a television commercial producer at a local TV station in Macon, Georgia a few years ago.  To date my record for holding a job - one job continuously - is almost two years.  I've had a work life full of variety.

My own career as an artist began in the mid-70's.  I was 16 years old.  After a year working with the local community theater - originally recruited to audition by my mom - I accepted summer employment with the Rockerville Meller Dramer in a little tourist trap just outside Rapid City, South Dakota:  my very first paid acting job.  As a graduating senior, I told my dad I wanted to study theatre in college; he said, "Why don't you study art - you draw so well!"  I said "What's the difference, Dad?  I can be a starving artist or a starving actor."  He shrugged, co-signed the loan papers, and I enrolled as a freshman co-ed at the University of South Dakota, declaring my major - Theatre Arts.    At that point I didn't know what sort of career I would have - I just knew that I had been bit by the theatre bug, and I was officially a "junkie".

Today, with more than 25 years of production credits and employment history behind me - and the great honor of having an Arts Access Award named after me - I consider myself a professional theatre artist.  Now, I seldom give unsolicited advice - and I don't often appreciate receiving unsolicited advice.  But, I was invited to speak - and in the time-honored tradition of fine actors everywhere, I just couldn't turn down a chance to be in the limelight.

So, if you want my advice about a pursuing a career as an Artist, the first thing I'll tell you is:  Don't do it.  Don't do it unless you absolutely cannot live without making your art - whatever it is.  Music, dance, painting, drawing, sculpting, films, literature, poetry, theatre, performance art ... whatever.  If you're thinking about going into the Arts for the money, or because you want to be famous ... DO NOT DO IT.  If Rich & Famous are your fundamental goals, get out of the Arts and get into information technology.  But, if you're thinking about a career in the arts because you know that making your art is something you absolutely have to do - that you will wither away and die if you don't do it - then my advice is equally simple.  Don't mess around about it  - DO IT.  And do it to the absolute best of your abilities.

Following my spinal cord injury in 1980, I almost gave up my dream of working professionally in the Theatre; but when I tried to imagine what else I would do, I couldn't.  I could not conjure up an image of myself  not  doing theatre.  It was kind of scary, but in that instant I made a lifetime commitment to the Arts.  I don't do theatre in order to get rich and famous.  And I've succeeded; I'm not rich or famous.

But I do work in the Arts, and I have done so continuously since my graduation from university.  I have worked as an Actor/Educator with CLIMB Theatre; I toured for two seasons with Illusion Theatre, and in England with Cosmorama Theatre.  Black Swan Theatre, another English touring company, employed me as scriptwriter and director.  And I have been employed repeatedly as an arts administrator:  Assistant to the Director of the Arts Resource & Information Center at the Minneapolis Institute of Arts, under the supervision of Robert Booker, whom many of you may know from the Minnesota State Arts Board;  Secretary to the Education Director at Minnesota Museum of Art in St. Paul; Box Office Manage At the Foot of the Mountain Theatre; Tour Manager for an independent performer; Administrative Assistant at The Playwright's Center; Associate Director of SteppingStone Theatre; Drama Coach at First Street Arts Center; Program Coordinator, and currently, Arts Outreach Coordinator with VSA arts of Georgia.

My volunteer work on boards of directors with various non-profit arts organizations has also brought me a wealth of information and experience in administrative issues, strategies and skills.  These volunteer experiences have contributed notably to my professional development and growth - they have deepened my education and broadened my skills for working in the Arts.  I also continue regular moonlighting as an independent freelance performer, and sometime residency artist.  At this point in my life, it's very nice to receive a regular paycheck; it's even nicer to feel good about the job I go to each day, and the broader context in I work with all my professional colleagues.  I am doing what I want to do - what I am supposed to be doing - and I continue to explore the further possibilities of my work.

What do you want to do?  When you imagine yourself five, ten, fifteen years from now - if you could be doing absolutely anything you want to do - what would it be?  What WILL it be?  In order to get there, first you have to imagine it.  If you can dream it, you can do it.  Follow your bliss.  Discover what you are passionate about, and leverage that into a career.  You can specialize, and be a painter - just a painter.  Or you can diversify, which is what I did.  It's sort of like an investment portfolio.  And that's what it is - an investment in yourself.

You may need to make additional investments as well.  If you are not already 100% certain that a career in the Arts is what you want, you may need to explore that question more deeply before deciding about pursuing higher education and further training.  The resource book provided to you at this forum, Putting Creativity to Work, can help get you started; you'll find this a practical guide with strategic tips, specific questions and valuable exercises to help guide you through the process of defining your interests, skills and needs, and clarifying your choices.  Other books, such as What Color is Your Parachute? may also offer additional ideas about employment options and career choices.

Job counseling agencies and vocational rehabilitation programs can also provide you with additional resources.  Professional agencies like the Media Access Office in North Hollywood, and the National Arts & Disability Center In Los Angeles can help you network with peers and professional colleagues.  Here in Minneapolis, you may want to check out the Center for Independent Artists, a new organization with the goal of "distributing the mantle of leadership onto the shoulders of artists themselves".  Reading, viewing, considering, discussing and critiquing the work of your fellow artists who work to create authentic voices of personal experience is also important.  For example, Lynn Manning and the other writers and performers featured and nurtured by The Other Voices project at L.A.'s Mark Taper Forum; Chicago's Mike Ervin and Susan Nussbaum; Billy Golfus' video "When Billy Broke His Head...";  performances by Berkeley's Wry Crips; the skateboard hip-hop of "Crutch" Shannon; Chuck Baird's unique images of sign language and Deaf culture; performance art by the "Queen of Gnarly" Cheryl Marie Wade; and the Mini-Apple's own Leslye Orr, Kevin Kling and Joseph Baird.  These are just a few examples of dedicated independent artists who continue to generate daring, provocative work that flies in the face of the stereotypical, mass-produced images of people with disabilities.  And bless them all for offering us alternative images of Disability ~ Pride ~ Culture as something more than mutually-exclusive terms!

You will need self-advocacy skills in your search for employment in the Arts, so make friends with your local Center for Independent Living.  Seek out your peers and talk to each other.  Build a support system of individuals who will affirm your process of choosing how to create your own career.  When you work with employment counselors and career consultants, it's vital that you have some firm ideas about how your interests and abilities may be utilized in the job market, and how you envision yourself earning a living.  Learn to operate within the state and federal systems that provide assistance, including your state Vocational Rehabilitation department, employment agencies, and the funding community.  It can be tough to get through the bureaucracy - but that in itself is very good training and practice in self-advocacy and persistence, and it will fortify your commitment to reach your goals and achieve your dreams.

If you are a service provider working with persons with disabilities, ask questions of us, listen to us, and respect our right to make choices for ourselves - even if you may disagree with us.  I'm not sure any employment counselor would advise any job-seeker to enter the Arts as a career, but it is a viable work arena.  Please don't discourage us when we express our interest in the Arts.  I still remember my voc rehab counselor's response when I told him I was going back to school to finish my BA in theatre arts, and then on to pursue a professional career in the Arts.  He told me that wasn't a good idea, and it just wouldn't work.  His comments and his attitude frightened and disheartened me.  I almost followed his advice, but then a fire lit up in my belly!  Maybe that was his way of motivating me.  But sometimes I wonder how much more I would have dared to dream and do if I had received a single word of encouragement, and some rudimentary resources and lukewarm support.

Vocational rehabilitation counselors can provide valuable guidance through the state administrative system, a system designed to provide resources to facilitate training and continuing education.  A well-matched team of open-minded counselor and goal-oriented client can collaboratively design and implement an effective career plan in a reasonable time frame; but both collaborators need to consider a career in the Arts a reasonable option, and an attainable goal.  And getting through a state bureaucracy is also great practice in making choices and persevering.  And you will definitely need skills in both of those areas if you do choose a career in the Arts.

Don't let service providers and other administrators convince you that the Arts are not a viable employment arena for you as a person with a disability.  Remember, it's not impossible just because it may be difficult for someone else to envision.  Literally hundreds of thousands of jobs worldwide are found in the Arts and entertainment industries.  There are administrative, technical, design, creative, marketing, and human resource opportunities in arts-related jobs.  In our increasingly global economy, imaginative approaches to work and education are needed. Physical and programmatic access needs to be supported by an inclusive attitude.  And all trained and qualified workers need to be utilized effectively and humanely, because all of us have the right to earn a living and be contributing citizens - and taxpayers!

Administrators who make hiring policies and decisions need to implement and promote affirmative employment practices at all levels.  Materials announcing available positions need to include appropriate language and symbols that indicate the provision of accessibility and accommodations, such as the international wheelchair symbol, and the graphics that signify the availability of audio description services and sign language interpretation.    Look for these when you are researching and job-hunting; if you don't see them, ask about them.  Accessible parking spaces need to be clearly and appropriately marked, and even monitored for illegal usage.  Curb cuts need to be appropriately placed and clearly marked with textured surfaces for visually impaired individuals.  Accessible restrooms should also have clear signage, and they need to be truly accessible - just because I can get my wheelchair into the restroom or the stall doesn't necessarily mean I can close the door and have some privacy.  Organize your work space in a way that creates a welcoming environment that communicates attitudinal accessibility; the simple arrangement of the furniture, the height of counters and signage, the aesthetic ding of the elevator all tell me that you consider people with disabilities members of the human community who have a right to be included in the workplace - your workplace.

Those of you who may be interviewing and hiring potential employees also need to take applicants with disabilities seriously as potential employees.  Look around your office or facility - is the hallway piled up with equipment and supplies, so that only a narrow corridor is passable?  If it is clear of obstructions, great - but is the passage way at least 36 inches wide?  Do you provide application documents in alternative formats?  Will you offer a deaf applicant an opportunity to do an interview via instant messaging if a TTY or a sign language interpreter is not available?  Does your organization even own a TTY?  Is your staff trained in its use, and comfortable using it?  Do you offer them a chance to practice using it?  Be prepared to adapt or adjust as needed, within reason.  It's called reasonable accommodations, and it's required by law.

Respect our training, education and experience.  Interview us appropriately.  Practice your interviewing skills.  Are you aware that in a job interview, it is illegal for you to ask me how I became disabled?  Know the law as it applies to employment practices.  Get familiar with the Americans with Disabilities Act, and the Civil Rights Act of which it is a part.  Get informed about the regulations of ADA compliance. Learn the meaning of "reasonable accommodation" and "undue hardship, " and how they apply to your agency or organization - and your budget.  As an employer interviewing a potential employee, you need to focus on the essential job functions.  Instead of getting hung up about what I can't do, focus on what I can do.  Ask me how I will do the job, not if I can do it. Consider the possibility that a person with a disability may be the best person for the job.

And you artists and wanna-be-artists - if you really want that professional arts job, then BE the best person for the job!  Take responsibility for yourself.  As a professional, or-would-be-professional, take yourself and others seriously as artists.  Value what you do; take care of business, and take care of yourself.  Your Self is your most fundamental resource.

Take responsibility for yourself as a person with a disability.  Don't allow other people to define you by your disability, but don't deny it to yourself or anyone else.  Respect your boundaries - stretch your limitations.  Get health care; work on independence skills; if you work with personal caregivers, manage them in a professional manner; take good care of your skin, and your diet, your hands, your limbs - and do NOT "gimp out".  Do not allow yourself the luxury of using your disability as an excuse not to do your best.  It feeds the mythical, stereotypical image that we "can't handle it."  We can't just claim that we can handle - we have to do it.

Administrators in agencies that provide funds to artists and arts organizations are in a unique position; you have the opportunity not only to provide funding directly to specific artists and projects, but also to impact the hiring practices of arts organizations.  This in turn supports further career opportunities for artists with disabilities.  You can challenge the management of all sorts of organizations - artistic and otherwise - to put inclusive attitudes and effective accessibility strategies into practice.  Insist on knowing the demographics of the organizational staff; ask what plans are in place to diversify the staff, and the board of directors.  Challenge the organization to reach out to and effectively serve diverse populations.  Include disability in your definition of diversity.  Honor and reward organizations that create and implement alternative strategies, and innovative program design.  Affirm those agencies that practice inclusive hiring policies, as well as attitudinal, physical and programmatic access - you could nominate them for a Jaehny!

Don't be afraid to have high expectations of us.  And don't be surprised when we do well, when we are creative, innovative and productive.  I can't tell you how many times people have come up to me following a performance to share a comment, saying "Wow, you were really good!"  More than once I've had an almost uncontrollable urge to ask them, "Why do you sound so surprised?"  Unfortunately, all too often far too many people take the DIS in disability much too seriously, which fosters the stereotype that any sort of accomplishment by a person with a disability is some sort of miracle of achievement - that ole Super Crip Myth.

We need to be held to the same standards of artistic merit that applies to artists without disabilities, not separate standards.  We need to insist on it.  Not "Oh, that's very good - for a disabled artist."  I don't want to be a good disabled actor; I want to be a good actor.  Separate is not equal.  It is notable when an artist who uses a mouthstick to paint works on a large canvas to create an image in great detail - but that can be a massive undertaking for any of us.  All artists - and perhaps especially emerging and developing artists - need to know that their creative work is being considered, critiqued and supported based on its artistic merit.

If you're a budding artist who doesn't already have a specific notion of what type of artistic career you want to create for yourself, your first and foremost task is to get that clear.    Talk to people about what you like to do - and listen to yourself, listen to what you say to them.  Notice what you love to do - do you feel happiest when you're finger painting with children?  Do you prefer music to paint?  When you write poetry, do you lose all track of time and savor the reverie?  Does the rhythmic sound and feel of a floor loom captivate you for hours at a time?  What do you enjoy doing even when you are tired and frustrated, and just want to go home?  There's a clue in there...

Following my spinal cord injury - which, by the way, happened in a theatre while I was working on a university production - I knew I had to reevaluate my career plans and personal dreams.  I was forced to take a long, hard look at my choices.  And I found that I needed additional skills, beyond just the basics of performance.  So I challenged myself to accept positions doing work I'd never done before; and I learned new skills, and how to use skills I already possessed a bit differently.  Now, I do more than perform, and I don't do theatre exclusively.  My vision of what is possible for me expanded, because opportunities presented themselves - and I chose to accept them.  They didn't all turn out to be the perfect job for me, but when I let myself I learned something from each experience.  Look for those opportunities; be open to the unexpected.  Consider the surprise of chance encounters in relation to the goals you set for yourself.

Having those goals really helps - in fact it's vital to your success in creating a career for yourself.  Some goals are huge.  Some aren't.  I can remember a time when my goal for the day was to do a load of laundry - and it took almost all day to do it.  The scale of the goal doesn't matter as much as clarity of vision, the specificity of the goal.    For example - why are you here?  Not just on the planet, but in this room?  What is your goal in attending this conference?  Do you have one?  Have you thought about it?  Are you here to learn a new professional skill?  To glean additional job-seeking strategies?  To meet one new colleague with whom you can collaborate?  Why are you making the effort to get here today - and hopefully tomorrow?  Decide one thing you aim to get out of each workshop, or one question you can ask that will help get you where you want to be.  You need to make choices - well-informed, balanced, sometimes-risky, goal-oriented choices.  Make choices, or they will make you.  Will you create a career for yourself, or ride the tide wherever it takes you?

I cannot overemphasize the importance of training.  So I will say it quite plainly - GET TRAINED.  Consider which basic skills are necessary for your art-of-choice, and which are transferable from one type of work to another.  My propensity for tending to details serves me as a director, and as a playwright, an actor, a producer - and as an arts administrator.  And I'm learning how to have big picture visions.  Get trained in the basic artistic skills, and work at refining and strengthening your skills. And learn how to take care of business.  If you're going to freelance, you may have lots of freedom, but you will not have taxes withheld from a regular paycheck - so learn how to do your taxes, or get yourself a good tax accountant that you trust and can afford.

Study; get trained; go to school.    I don't care if it's community college, university, night classes in continuing education, art classes at a local arts center, or independent study using online resources.  Practice your craft, refine your skills, and never stop challenging your limitations and stretching your creativity.  If you want to be an actor, and the only job you can get is working a fast-food counter, practice your acting skills.  Pretend you enjoy it - that's performance!  All work experiences can feed your devel0pment as an artist - because each of those job experiences can develop you as a human being.    And as an artist that is your most vital resource - your humanity.  You have to be open to - you have to actively seek out - personal growth.  You need to develop your Self, as a person of depth and breadth in order to maximize your artistic potential.

Some people emphasize talent as a key element of a successful career.  Talent does come into play.  And many of the artists I admire most may well have had a "lucky break" at some point, but most of their careers consist primarily of applying themselves to the work.  Hard work and persistence are at least as important as talent and lucky breaks.  What They - the ubiquitous, all-knowing They --- what They don't always tell us is that these so-called lucky breaks find us by following the trail of our hard work; our efforts at continuing professional development, and our good humor and persistence in the face of adversity.  Lucky breaks find us when we are in the right place at the right time, on task, on the job  -  and open to unexpected opportunities.

For myself, I learned early on that I am not an artistic genius - but I was taught and coached to apply myself with discipline and determination.  And when I run out of those motivators, of course there's always good-old-fashioned perseverance - also known as pig-headedness.  There's a lot to be said for simply hanging in there.  More than once in my life I was not doing THE Job I really wanted, and more than once I've told myself, "It's okay - you're working in the Arts and that's a Good Thing."  I've tried to use every one of those opportunities as a professional development experience.

Don't pursue a career in the Arts unless you love the Arts truly, madly, deeply.  And do not have any delusions about what awaits you both in educational settings, and in the job market.  But please don't whine.  Remember - nobody owes you nothing.  If you think you're gonna get a break because you have a disability, think again.  There's that saying popular at the height of the feminist movement - to be considered half as good as a man, you gotta be twice as good as a man.  You better be the best you can be at what you do, and do not allow yourself to use your disability as an excuse NOT to work continually and consistently towards total professionalism and high standards of quality.

The flip side of that is learning to be utterly honest with yourself and other people about your abilities and limitations, and your interests and goals.  For example, I don't audition for the ballet.  I admire the art form and the athleticism of ballet dancers, and I have even enjoyed the ballet on more than once occasion.  But, I have no interest in becoming a ballerina, and I don't possess those skills.  I know that I am not the one to bring integrated dance practices to the performance of classical ballet- but I'd sure love to see it!  Maybe you're the one to take on that project.  Now that could be a tough row to hoe!

You may well encounter ignorance, prejudice, assumptions, idiocy, rudeness and perhaps even cruelty as you pursue your career as an artist.  Certainly do your best to resist injustice, learn and practice self-advocacy skills, respect yourself and your fellows - but don't whine about it.  Get on with it.  Are you willing to educate people who may see you as a cripple, who focus only on what you cannot do?  Are you willing to challenge them to see what you can do?  Will you audition in the lobby, or in the aisle, because the stage isn't wheelchair accessible?  Are you willing to explain how a blind person creates a painting if someone just doesn't get it?  Will you publish the poetry anthology yourself?  Will you attempt to communicate how a person who is Deaf can experience and appreciate music?  Are you willing to face and challenge your own assumptions, bigotries and prejudices?  How much effort are you willing to put into reaching your goals?

That old myth about "suffering for our art" has a grain of truth in it - a grain.  We live in a culture that doesn't value the arts nor professional artists in the same way it values sports and professional athletes.  Are you willing to hang in there?  For how long?  What's your limit?  Will you work at it for as long as it takes?  Are you willing to adapt your strategies and your goals to match your experiences and opportunities?  I don't need to know your answers to these questions - you do.  You don't necessarily have to answer them today, or tomorrow, or even this week.  But eventually you will need to address such questions  - you will have to make choices.  When I was figuring out what to do with myself and the rest of my life following my injury, I wondered, "What if I fail?  What if I try and try and try, and I still fail to make it as professional actor?"  Then it occurred to me - "What if I never even try?"

During my recovery and rehabilitation process, I attended counseling sessions regularly for months.  In addition to learning how to let someone support me in facing my fears of inadequacy, I learned a very useful little phrase - a kind of mantra.  "I refuse to be defeated by                                      __________"    -  and you fill in the blank;  other people's ignorance; my own laziness and lack of self-discipline, fear, lack of money ... whatever.  And then I learned to simplify.  "I refuse to be defeated."

Sometimes it's a fine line that divides knowing what you can do and what you want to achieve, and using a disability as an excuse for not succeeding.  I had to learn to accept that at times I did not get an acting role that I really wanted, one that I could perform beautifully, and I might never know why.  Were there times I didn't cast because I'm a wheelchair user?  Yes - certainly.  There were also times when I did get cast because I'm not your everyday garden-variety actor.

Dare to be truly yourself.  Acknowledge when you have given your best effort.  Accept mistakes, failure - even repeated failures -  rejection, criticism, and challenges; and learn from them.  Honor the attempt, get over it and get on with it.  If you rely strictly on others' approval for your self-esteem and equilibrium, you will be vulnerable to all manner of self-doubt.  Create a way to maintain your balance and perspective - whether it's meditation, exercise, games, sports, music, bubble baths (one of my personal favorites), pets, support groups - whatever.  Find a spiritual or personal practice that calms, nurtures and replenishes you.  Practice the care and feeding of your soul.  Take care of yourself and take care of business.  If you want a career in the Arts, you have a creative challenge ahead of you.  It could well be the toughest job you'll ever love.  It will certainly transform your life in ways you may never imagine.  It will be - it IS - worth your effort.

During the past decade in particular it has been gratifying to note the gradually increasing representation of human diversity in the media, and in the projects and productions coming out of the Arts and entertainment industries.  When I was "coming up" in the mid-80s, looking for role models and possibilities, there was no forum on careers in the Arts for people with disabilities.  The world is changing.  Increasing numbers of kids, youth and young adults with disabilities are learning that inclusion in all aspects of community life - including creative and artistic endeavors - is their human birthright.  And at long last at least some of the public images of people with disabilities are being created by people with disabilities.  A lot of it - dare I say most of it? -  is happening in the Arts; in the visual, literary, media and performing arts.  But it takes more than one effort and more than one voice to generate this kind of fundamental cultural change - it takes all of our efforts and all of our voices.  As a result of our ongoing creativity and perseverance, the public image of disability is changing.  And in my opinion it's a change for the better.

In closing, I'd like to share some thoughts borrowed from a writer who goes by the name of SARK.  One of her posters is on the wall in front of my personal prayer space at home; it's also on the wall of my workspace right above my computer, where I see it in big, bold colors, reminding me everyday why I keep and value my day job.

"How To Be An Artist:
Stay loose.  Learn to watch snails.  Plant impossible gardens.  Invite someone dangerous to tea.  Make little signs that say 'Yes!' and post them all over your house.  Make friends with freedom & uncertainty.  Look forward to dreams.  Cry during movies.  Swing as high as you can on a swingset, by moonlight.  Cultivate moods.  [ ... ]  Do it for love.  Take lots of naps.  [ ... ]  Believe in magic.  Laugh a lot.  Celebrate every gorgeous moment.  Take moonbaths.  Have wild imaginings, transformative dreams, and perfect calm.  Draw on the walls.  Read everyday.  Imagine yourself magic.  Giggle with children.  Listen to old people.  Open up.  Dive in.  Be free.  Bless yourself.  Drive away fear.  Play with everything.  [ ... ]  Build a fort with blankets.  [ ... ]  Hug trees.  Write love letters."

And when all else fails, I rely on SARK for one last-ditch strategy from another of her inspirational posters:

"Apply dog logic to life:  eat well, be loved, get petted, sleep a lot, dream of a leash free world."